Thursday, February 27

Ranking the Pokemon: #52- Dugtrio


Dugtrio is among the fastest Pokes in Generation I, and certainly the fastest ground type, so it has that going for it. You'd think that since they're just three Digletts put together (real creative, Game Freak) that their Attack would be, well...three times that of Diglett's. And you'd be WRONG. Duggy's base Attack is 80, while Diggy's is 55. That's not a fantastic increase, so maybe only one of these Digletts is actually strong, and the other two are just there for show.

Meanwhile, I STILL don't know if those pink things on Dugtrio's face is a nose or a mouth. And they still kind of look like a barrage of poops. Which I know all too well now that I have a dog.

Anyway, outside of the wonderful Speed and the decent Attack, Dugtrio's stats are all pretty bad. Its HP is just downright terrible. I'm pretty sure I could take a hit better than the Trio, and I'm not a Pokemon. Although if I was, they'd have to invent a new type: Weird. Because I'm weird.

Movewise, throw Earthquake and Rock Slide for sure. Slash is pretty good, too, although I'd love to know just what Dugtrio is using to slash opponents. I wish Dig got a bonus since Dugtrio is clearly its namesake Pokemon, but alas, it's just an inferior version of Earthquake. I'd probably forgo it in favor of some Normal-type attack, or even Rest. Though by the time you wake up, that HP might be more gone than Dugtrio's nose/mouth, whichever you think it doesn't have.

Battling Grade: B-

Sunday, February 23

Brian Williams Raps "Rapper's Delight", Which IS, In Fact, A Delight



Once again, Jimmy Fallon's been nailing it in the early going of his hosting The Tonight Show. This time around, he's created a super clip of NBC Nightly News's Brian Williams "rapping" Rapper's Delight by The Sugarhill Gang. Of course, he brings some friends, Lester Holt and Kathie Lee. Good stuff all around. And probably for the best that they didn't do the full 11 minutes.

Saturday, February 22

What If The Olympics Were Mario Kart Instead?



They'd be a lot better, that's for sure. YouTuber timtimfed gives us quite the chuckle with this Mario Kart Double Dash installment. Laughter abounds.

Thursday, February 20

Jimmy Fallon Gives The Ignition Remix A Ragtime Makeover



R Kelly's "Ignition (Remix)" is maybe the greatest song ever penned. Jimmy Fallon recognizes this, and along with his Ragtime Gals, he's given it a nice little doo-wop treatment. He's definitely killing it in his first week hosting The Tonight Show.

Saturday, February 15

Frank Caliendo's Richard Sherman Mockumentary is Genius



This came out a couple weeks ago, but it's too good not to share. Frank Caliendo, who already has the market cornered as far as impressions go, dons about eight different hats in this ESPN 30 for 30 mockumentary. The topic? Richard Sherman, of course. Watch and enjoy–it's magical.

Friday, February 14

Space Jam Mod For NBA 2K14 Is Fantastic



A big kudos goes out to MkEliteWorksX, who has modded NBA 2K14 to include Space Jam characters. They're all here: Bugs, Lola, the Monstars, and of course his Royal Airness himself. Coupled with the great soundtrack going on in the background? Not too shabby. Virtually every shot is made, too, just like in the real game. The only thing missing is a Michael Jordan halfcourt dunk to win the game. Maybe in 2015.

Wednesday, February 12

Mean Tweets Is Back!



Oh, glorious day. In what is probably Jimmy Kimmel's best sketch, celebrities read mean tweets directed at them. And, as always, the results are hilarious. Let's go!

Tuesday, February 11

Aziz Ansari On Being Single



This is so accurate it's not even funny. But actually it is, so enjoy, and laugh.

Sunday, February 9

Let's See a Show!: CHAPPO feat. Royal Teeth and TEAM

It's been a minute since I've gone to see a concert, but the good folks at Crash-Avenue PR were putting on an evening at Stubb's, which is quickly becoming one of my go-to show places. How did the event stack up to past nights at Stubb's? Well, let's dive right in!

First, I must mention that the dedication of Austin concertgoers is pretty impressive. The city has been under a cold spell lately, with temperatures dipping into the 20s. Of course, being a native of Chicago, I should consider that "shorts and a t-shirt" weather, but I haven't experienced a full Chicago winter in eight years, so give me a break. But you'd hardly believe it was cold outside with how packed the venue was. Good job, Austinites.

TEAM led off the evening with a performance heavy on the "hoo-oohs" and lots of falsetto, psychedelic vocals. I was digging 'em, and especially enjoyed the high-fives and handshakes in between songs. Lead singer Rico Andradi announced that this was only the third time the band had played together, which may have explained the congratulations after successfully completing a tune. I know MY band was not that sharp after just three sessions, but then again, I assume TEAM has practiced a bit more. Anyway, a good way to begin the night.


Royal Teeth was up next, and brought a rabid following around with them–they asked who had seen them before, and the hands that shot up were probably about 70% of the crowd. Vocalists Gary Larsen (as far as I know, he does not publish cartoons) and Nora Patterson had a really fun chemistry, hopping around the stage and acting a fool as they harmonized over old and new songs alike. Royal Teeth is also extremely crowd-friendly, asking for audience sing-alongs and even grabbing someone's iPhone and shooting an on-stage video with it. By the end of the set, Larsen had grabbed a floor tom and headed into the crowd, banging it in the center of the large circle that had formed. On a side note, I love that the proper response to "How are you doing tonight?" is a lot of yelling and hollering. Good times.


CHAPPO wrapped up the night; immediately I felt like I was watching a futureistic film. They're very big in creating a mysterious atmosphere, with light effects, smoke, and costume changes–I definitely spotted a cowboy getup that I may need to consider investing in. I do live in Texas now, after all. And their shadows projected onto the wall behind them certainly looked like some of Tim Burton's creations.

Musically, the Brooklyn-based group certainly embraces psychedelic rock, with pulsating drums and synths like nobody's business. Lead singer Alex Chappo also found his way into the crowd to pound on a tom drum and do some singing. Apparently it's a trend at Stubb's. But hey, making the audience feel like an integral part of the show is always a good thing, so kudos for that. Until next time, keep on rockin'!

Thursday, February 6

Terrence Ross Will Defend His Dunk Title



Look at me, making predictions! I thought the kid would win last year, and now, the Toronto Raptor gets the chance to defend his dunk title. But first, he needs a little practice. Denver's Kenneth Faried was nice enough to volunteer himself for a poster. This jam may be a few days old, but that doesn't make it any less sweet. Gets my midseason vote for Dunk of the Year.

Wednesday, February 5

Ranking the Pokemon: #53- Parasect

Remember the little baby parasites that Paras had on its back? Well, they have somehow morphed into one big mushroom, and now they've taken over this poor crab, or whatever Parasect is. I like to imagine 'secty is wearing glasses, since its eyes aren't visible.

Parasect has strong Attack and pretty good HP and Special, so it's not a terrible battler. That big mushroom must be heavy, though, since Parasect is slower than molasses. Like, I could stop writing this, take a walk, maybe even deposit a check at the ATM, and still have time to make some hot cocoa before Parasect could even lift a claw. 

Parasector Z (and Paras) are the only Generation I Pokes that learn the move Spore, and that's a cool bonus. I like moves that work 100% of the time, and being able to put someone to sleep with 100% accuracy is pretty fantastic. Slash was also a solid move in its heyday, racking up critical hits like it ain't no thang. It's probably worth including Stun Spore, too. Even though its accuracy leaves something to be desired, if you play with some kids that complain when you put too many of their Pokes to sleep, you can paralyze one instead. As for the final move, why not take advantage of Parasect's Grass-type and put Solarbeam on there. Sure, you might die before you can even get a shot off, but hey, that big mushroom taking in energy looks pretty sweet.

Battling Grade: B-

Monday, February 3

Bad Lip Reading Revisits the NFL



Think football season is over now that the Super Bowl happened? Well, the Broncos might not have realized the game occurred, but oh well. In any case, the answer is no--in fact, football is still quite alive and well, and it's filled with bad lip reading. Join us for the ride as we check out some silly things. Let's gooooo!

Saturday, February 1

MetLife Commercial Starring Peanuts Characters Brings The Feels



No words in this commercial, but plenty of feelings. Join Charlie Brown, Snoopy and the gang as MetLife Stadium gets ready to host the Super Bowl. Let's get 'er done!

Newcastle Super Bowl Ad With Anna Kendrick



Anna Kendrick, one of A Hot Cup of Joey's Hollywood crushes, may not be able to say "Super Bowl" in advance of the big game, but as a humble blog, I certainly can. And this Newcastle ad featuring the starlet is quite fantastic. Referring to herself as "hottest girl in your improv class hot," the spot joins Kendrick complaining about Newcastle's lack of money. It's funny, it's genius, and hey, it makes me want some Newcastle. Win win win.