Saturday, December 27

Ranking the Pokemon: #3- Starmie

We're finally here. The Top 3. If we were dishing out Olympic medals, Starmie would get the bronze. You obtain a Starmie by giving a Staryu a Water Stone, and it essentially just doubles itself and turns purple. Love it. Along with Staryu, Starmie is also part of a glitch in Pokemon Gold and Silver, in which they could learn egg moves, but because they're genderless Pokemon and couldn't breed, you couldn't actually get said egg moves. Good work, GameFreak.

But anyway, we're talking about Starmie in Generation I here. And even back then, Starmie was a beast. HP isn't anything special, but it only improves from there--its Attack and Defense are both above average, its Special is great, and its Speed is outstanding. Plus it looks cool hurtling itself through the air like some sort of rogue ninja star.

Starmie technically only learns Tackle, Harden and Water Gun, so you either need to use whatever moves you learn as Staryu before evolving it, or just load up on TMs. I prefer the latter, because Starmie learns an abundance of moves. You'll definitely want to go the route of a special sweeper; I personally like the Thunder Wave/Thunderbolt/Surf/Psychic combo. That way you can annoy people by paralyzing 'em, and you get two STAB moves with Surf and Psychic. But you could also throw Blizzard on there as another attack, or add to the annoyance with Double Team or Reflect, or keep Recover on there to gain back some HP and duet with the band CHVRCHES.

The point is, Starmie is quite versatile. With the tremendous Speed, you'll be attacking first in nearly every situation, and the quality Special means those attacks will be doing strong damage. Also, if you've ever held a starfish in your hand, it's pretty incredible. So brownie points for that.

Battling Grade: A

Previously: #4- Mewtwo

Friday, December 26

Shaquille O'Neal Takes Out A Christmas Tree On "Inside The NBA"

 
Christmas Day is a good time for NBA fans. With five games on the docket, you can get your hoops fix in for like 13 straight hours. And in between the action, the studio shows keep us entertained, too.
 
In this case, Inside the NBA saw Kenny Smith and Shaquille O'Neal racing toward a Christmas tree. And, thanks to a little shove from Smith, the Shaqtus went flying into said tree, taking out a ton of ornaments and presents. Flagrant two!

Tuesday, December 23

SNL Parodies Serial Podcast With Incredible Accuracy


Man, Saturday Night Live is on fire lately. This time they're spoofing the hit podcast Serial, and doing it with alarming hilarity. Cecily Strong plays a perfect Sarah Koenig, who's a little bit skeptical of the guy they call Santa Clause.

Everything in here, from Koenig's conversational demeanor, to her phone conversations with her subject, to the weird lawyer yelling like she's talking to a five-year old, is on point. Just so on point. Even if you've never seen Serial, this is worth a laugh. Enjoy!

Monday, December 22

SNL Delivers Hilarious Church Skit Just In Time For The Holidays


As is often the case, Saturday Night Live has been real hit or miss this year. Even supposed "instant classics", like Martin Freeman starring in "The Hobbit Office" I haven't found particularly funny.

But when SNL hits, it's an absolute home run.

The latest is a local church advertisement, rolling out a Christmas Mass Spectacular. Having gone to church regularly, this is so spot on. The out-of-tune organist, the pastor making quiet jokes, the various parishioners...it's just incredible. Enjoy.


Friday, December 19

Adam Levine Covers R Kelly's "Ignition"


Who doesn't love R Kelly's "Ignition"? Fools, that's who. At a Season 7 party for The Voice, Adam Levine found himself covering the R&Ber's 2003 jam, and it was quite wonderful. The only thing that would make it more wonderful? If whoever took this video held their iPhone horizontally. Someday people will learn...

Thursday, December 18

"Chanukah" Parody Of Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off" Is Fantastic


Whenever Taylor Swift comes out with a song, the parodies are plentiful. From all the goats and screaming in "I Knew You Were Trouble" to the various agist knockoffs of "22", the pop star has her admirers.

Among that throng of performers is Jewish a cappella group Six13. They've done a parody of Swift's "Shake It Off", entitled "Chanukah". And it's pretty fantastic. Check it out!

Wednesday, December 17

Hockey Check Causes Broken Glass, Chaos Everywhere


Proving that minor league hockey is just as entertaining as the pros, the ECHL's Todd Fiddler delivered an incredible hit on Wichita's Theo Peckham right at the start of the third period of a game recently. This hit was so powerful it actually shattered the front of glass, injuring a few people in the stands (though fortunately none too seriously). I'm sure there was also a lengthy delay in cleaning up the glass--considering this came 13 seconds after intermission, that's a lot of waiting around. But I gotta say...it's kind of worth it. What a hit!

Monday, December 15

Tyson Chandler Blocks Marreese Speights' Shoe Into Crowd


The Warriors beat the Mavericks 105-98 over the weekend, in a game that largely wasn't worth watching. Dallas made a late rally to make the score respectable, but otherwise, it was a lot of yuck. Midway through the third quarter, Warriors forward Marreese Speights lost a shoe near halfcourt. Steph Curry picked it up and tried to toss it to him. Tyson Chandler WAS NOT HAVING IT. Chandler swatted the shoe into the crowd, and chaos reigned. Best defense the Mavs played all day. Austin Powers still hasn't been reached for comment.

Sunday, December 14

Corey Brewer Takes Somewhere Between 10 and 14 Steps On A Dunk, Travel Not Called


Okay, maybe the amount of steps was an embellishment, but hot dog, this was most certainly a travel. Oh well, rules are overrated anyway.

Saturday, December 13

Hot Tub Time Machine 2 Trailer Released


Hot Tub Time Machine 2 is just a few months away, and the first official trailer has been released.
Astute observers might notice from the picture above (or the trailer) that John Cusack is missing. He's not in this movie, but Adam Scott and Gillian Jacobs should provide an equal amount of laughs. And of course, Rob Corddry, Craig Robinson and Clark Duke all reprise their roles. Hot Tub Time Machine 2 is due for a February 20 release date.

Thursday, December 11

Jimmy Fallon and Steve Carell Join Forces To Perform Barbershop Quartet Version Of Sexual Healing

 
I've always wanted to perform in a barbershop quartet. It just seems so jovial and fun. Jimmy Fallon and Steve Carell both get to live out that dream, as they perform Marvin Gaye's "Sexual Healing" with The Tonight Show barbershop quartet The Ragtime Gals. Groovy good stuff.

Wednesday, December 10

Actor Christopher Lee Releases Heavy Metal Christmas Album


This is a sign to never let age get in the way of your dreams, kids. Actor Christopher Lee, who's appeared in The Lord of the Rings, Dracula, Star Wars, and a host of other movies, is releasing Darkest Carols, Faithful Sing, a heavy metal album he recorded with Hedras Ramos. This is actually Lee's third heavy metal album; last year's "Jingle Hell" reached No. 18 on the Billboard charts.

Oh yes, Lee was 91 years old when that happened. NINETY-ONE! The oldest charting artist ever. Just incredible. Check out a sample of the new record below, from the now 92-year-old actor.

Tuesday, December 9

Ranking the Pokemon: #4- Mewtwo


If we were going on stats alone, Mewtwo would be #1. Everything it has is just absurd. Its worst stat is Defense, which is at 90. That's an above average score, and again, that's its WORST stat. 

As a whole, Mewtwo's total base stats equal 580, which is the most of any Generation I Pokemon. Its Special is the highest of any Pokemon in Generation I. Its Speed is the second highest of Generation I, behind just Electrode. It's seventh in HP, and tied for 10th in Attack. It's even in the Top 30 for Defense, which, once more, is its worst stat. That means even in its absolute worst category, Mewtwo is still in the top 20% of all Generation I Pokemon.

Unfortunately, that incredibly overpowered skill set causes Mewtwo to drop a few notches. You see, Mewtwo isn't allowed in many battles as a legendary Pokemon. What's more, there are tournaments where everyone is eligible EXCEPT Mewtwo (and sometimes Mew, as well). Mewtwo is like the weird kid in high school who's probably almost 30, but no one's ever dared to find out because they don't want to talk to him. In the game's story, Mewtwo is actually a genetic experiment gone wrong. Sounds about right--a fun experiment to try on your friends is to use a team of six Mewtwos, then see how long it takes for your friends to stop talking to you forever.

Movewise, there are only a handful of TMs Mewtwo doesn't learn. My personal favorite moveset is Psychic, Thunderbolt, Blizzard and Recover. Psychic for the STAB, Thunderbolt to take out common Water and Flying-types, Blizzard to freeze Grass and Grounders, and Recover to just be a jerk and gain health when your opponent finally thinks your Mewtwo is a goner. Serves them right for being hopeful.

Battling Grade: A+

Monday, December 8

Bobby Moynihan Plays Aging Princess Leia In Star Wars Spoof


Saturday Night Live has been especially hit or miss lately, but man, the hits are just glorious. Check out this fake trailer for The Force Awakens, combining the new crew with the old school. The original cast, having aged quite a bit since the first Star Wars movies, is not quite their once agile selves. Good stuff all around, but Bobby Moynihan really steals the scene as an elderly Princess Leia.

Saturday, December 6

Portland State Player Fakes Handshake At End Of Game, Steals Ball And Dunks It


During an 83-71 loss to Portland, Portland State's Bryce White pretended to shake hands with the opposing team, then stole the ball, dribbled down the court and dunked it. That cut the lead from 14 to 12. Talk about playing until the final whistle.

But wait! Apparently the spread in this game opened at -12.5 Portland. So, by doing that underhanded steal and dunk, the Vikings (that's Portland State) ended up covering. Vegas, you've struck again!

Friday, December 5

Hockey Player Fits In Six "Meows" During Postgame Interview


Goodness, I love when players have fun in their interviews. And if they're referencing the best scene from a movie? Even better.

In this case, the movie being referenced is Super Troopers, a film from 2001 that has a few fantastic moments, but otherwise is largely forgettable. What's UNFORGETTABLE, though, is when two of the troopers play the "Meow Game," where they see how many times they can fit the word "meow" into a conversation.

During a recent ECHL game, Ray Kaunisto of the Kalamazoo Wings threw six meows into a two-question interview with reporter Ben Garrod. Garrod appreciated the humor of things, and hopefully some folks at the game got a kick out of it, too.

Thursday, December 4

Austin Filmmaker Keller Davis Is Opening His Couch Up For Moviegoers

Couch Fest is a worldwide event where short film marathons are hosted in some unorthodox locales. Couches, offices, anything is fair game, so long as it's not a movie theatre. 

Austin filmmaker Keller Davis, who won an award back in 2011 for his short film POWERPOINT, is now opening up his office for the inaugural Austin installment of Couch Fest. Keller took some time to chat with A Hot Cup Of Joey about the event, hosting, and what his dream movie marathon would be.

The event page for Austin's Couch Fest can be found here, and other locales can be found on the Couch Fest website. If you're in one of the towns, stop by!

Tuesday, December 2

Better Call Saul Releases Another Trailer, This Time With Jonathan Banks



Most fans of Breaking Bad will probably cite Mike as one of their favorite characters. Finally, AMC has given us a trailer of their spinoff show Better Call Saul that features Jonathan Banks, who played the aforementioned Mike. And he's kicking butt in his normal, stedfast way. Well done.

Better Call Saul stars Bob Odenkirk and premieres on February 8 at 10 EST/9 CST. Can't wait.

Monday, December 1

Ryan Fitzpatrick Throws Six Touchdowns, Has Son Show Off Math Skills During Press Conference


Ryan Fitzpatrick just had the game of his career, throwing for 358 yards and six touchdowns. He's just the 34th quarterback in NFL history to toss at least six scores. But at his postgame press conference, Fitzpatrick wanted to put some spotlight on his son, Brady. He had Brady come up, and asked a reporter to name two numbers between 90 and 99, which happened to be 93 and 97. Brady then solved the problem in his head in about five seconds.

Sure, there's a little math trick you can use to figure this out, but it still requires some quick subtracting and multiplying in your head. Brady handled this easily--next stop, following in his father's footsteps at Harvard?