Thursday, September 29

Heat Big Three To Host NBA Exhibition Game in Miami

Well fans, it's happened. A Hot Cup of Joey was recently published on, and will continue submitting work for the site. Of course, we'll still update on here, but relevant/current sports-related topics will most likely go on Stack first. Check out the first article below, and thanks for the support!

Heat Big Three To Host NBA Exhibition Game in Miami

Tuesday, September 27

How Athletics and Pokemon Are Not That Far Apart

Any fan of A Hot Cup knows we love the Pokemon games. Sure, there are plenty of duds that have come out with the Pokemon moniker on it (e.g. Hey You, Pikachu!, Pokemon Rumble), but as far as the actual RPGs go, they're great. And even better, athletes can use them as a training device, since Pokemon and athletics share several characteristics.

Practice, Practice, Practice
Any sport, regardless of what it is, requires practice. Sure, you may be naturally good with a basketball, but to really excel, you'll need to put in a lot of effort, whether it's shooting hoops at the gym, dribbling around snowmen during the winter months, or passing off a wall when you can't find anyone to pass back. Similarly, in the world of Pokémon, no trainer is going to waltz up to the Elite 4 and win. Building a solid team takes time and practice, and that practice comes in the form of battling and leveling-up.

Supplement the Workout
Of course, making it to the elite level isn't just a matter of doing time in the gym, whether in sports or Pokemon. Athletes have a few different methods of supplementing, whether it's protein shakes or powders, nutritional tablets, or something as simple as carb-loading. Pokemon and athletics aren't far apart--say you want your Charmander to get some more Attack power; you feed it some Protein. Or perhaps your Golduck is a little low on HP; just toss it some HP Up vitamins and you'll see its strength go up. The right balance of training and supplementing creates a solid physical specimen.

Tests Before Glory
Never will an athlete be crowned champion by winning their first match or game. Yes, the goal is the Super Bowl, NBA Finals, World Series, Stanley Cup, World Cup, the U.S. Open, Masters...whatever the peak accomplishment of your sport may be. But you don't just snap your fingers and appear there. Tests occur along the way. Last year's Packers are a great example. With a multitude of injuries, including season-ending ones to their starting running back and tight end, the Pack could have, well, packed it in and waited until next season. Instead, they used an unbelievable season from QB Aaron Rodgers to propel themselves into a wildcard spot. Once in the playoffs, Green Bay defeated the NFC's 1, 2 and 3 seeds before dismantling the Pittsburgh Steelers to hoist the Lombardi Trophy. And once again, Pokemon and athletics intersect. Before ultimately beating the last champion, the trainer must go through many battles, but specifically he or she must conquer the region's eight gyms, defeating the leader and their cronies in each. Only then will they get a crack at the grand prize: the title of Pokemon League Champion.

With video games moving more and more into realistic settings, the ways athletes can use them to train will continue to improve. For now, though, Pikachu and pals offer a solid blueprint of what it takes to become an elite athlete.

Ranking the Pokemon: #130- Poliwag

Looking at Poliwag, one would think it would learn Hypnosis, since its stomach looks like any hypnosis device ever. And you'd be right. But that's about all Poliwag has going for it, and Hypnosis ain't even that great since it's not 100% accurate. The tadpole does eventually evolve into some stronger things, but until then, it's got about as much bite as its mouth is big, which is not very. I'm sure there was a more graceful way to put that sentence, but I'm talking about a tadpole, so there isn't much grace to begin with. Sorry, Waggy

Grade: D

Previously: #131- Lickitung

Stinkabod Dream

Goodness, I wish I could explain the reasoning for this song being stuck in my head, but I can't. And since I actually uploaded this video, I'll just copy and paste the explanation here.

Way back in the mid 90s, graphic artist Rodney Greenblat (he worked on PaRappa the Rapper, if that's any help) made a game called Dazzleloids. It was ridiculous and featured four "heroes" (the Dazzleloids) as they went through numerous adventures to try and stop the Mediogre (the "villain") from doing various things, such as boring the entire neighborhood to death. It's one of those quirky games that got overlooked, but I always had a blast playing it.

Anyways, each character had both a "good" and "bad" dream. This is Stinkabod's good one. I think. I mean it's pretty awesome, so I assume it's the good one, but who knows? Either way, enjoy!

Also, I own no rights to this video, it's all a creation of Mr. Rodney Greenblat. I just think it's hilarious, so I'm sharing it with the world.

Finally, I apologize for the random seizure-inducing moments (i.e. the screen flashes) throughout the video. I have no idea why it uploaded like that.

Thursday, September 22

Ranking the Pokemon: #131- Lickitung

I'm going to be honest, the only reason Lickitung is this high up is because I completely forgot about it. Also that picture makes me laugh. But Lickitung is slow, dumb and has a long tongue, and those are really its only specialties. If I want a slow, dumb Pokemon, I'll pick up a Slowbro because it can at least use Psychic or Thunder Wave or Surf or SOMETHING that's not completely terrible. Here are some fun facts about Lickitung (other than its inability to be useful in battle--thanks, Bulbapedia!): It's original name was Tonguetyd (yes, spelled that way), and despite having an obviously long tongue that licks everything in sight, it didn't even know the move Lick until the second generation of games. Way to drop the ball on that one, Game Freak. And then Lickitung would probably lick the ball because it thinks it's a Jawbreaker. Sigh...

Grade: F

Tuesday, September 20

The Lonely Island at the Emmys

Any fan of A Hot Cup knows The Lonely Island is a big hit over here. While the lyrics are often sophomoric and juvenile, they make many folks laugh, and the songs themselves are catchy to boot. Too bad live (especially in medley form) they're just not as good. Check out their performances from the Emmys below, with a ton of random guest stars in addition to Michael Bolton and Akon (who sounds AWFUL). Enjoy?

Jon Lajoie Doesn't Give a Chainsaw

Canadian comedian Jon Lajoie has never been one to mince words. Especially F-bombs, he'll drop them like they were, I don't know, Pogs or something like that. That hasn't changed in his latest video, entitled "F**k Everything." But the hilarity is still there--this rivals his "Everyday Normal Guy" videos in terms of the funny. Well done, good sir. Well done.

Monday, September 19

Ranking the Pokemon: #132- Magnemite

I really wanted to put Pikachu here, because he's arguably the most annoying Pokemon in any game, although Emolga makes a strong case for it with its obsessive use of Double Team. But since we're only focused on the RBY series, screw Emolga. Not literally, because it's a rodent and probably has rabies. But you know what I mean.

Anyways, back to the list. Magnemite, not Pikachu, wins the award for "worst Electric Pokemon" because in the first generation of games Magnemite is solely an Electric-type. In later games, it also becomes a dual Steel-type, which gives it some absurdly high defenses. But since we're doing this list as if it's only 151 Pokemon and there were only three RPGs to have existed (really just one, but we're counting Red, Blue and Yellow as all different games), Magnemite is pretty useless. It learns Sonicboom, which automatically does 20 damage to any Pokemon, so he's useful if you transfer it over to Pokemon Stadium and use him in that one cup where it's only un-evolved Pokes (like some of the suckers on this list already, e.g. Caterpie and Tentacool).

Wow, we're getting off track again. Magnemite also loses coolness points because its evolved form is just three of them put together. Diglett will suffer from this later, too, but for now it's Magny's turn. It's slow, when Electrics normally pride themselves on speed, and it has Thunder Wave, which is fantastic when it's on your team, but just annoying when it's not. And since you probably won't be battling with Magnemite too often, you guessed it--it's annoying.

Grade: D+

Previously: #133- Oddish

Abe Lincoln: Trick Shot Quarterback

It's the year of the quarterback in the NFL (Cam Newton, arguably a run-first QB, has thrown for over 850 yards in his first two career games), so who better than would-be 202-year old Abraham Lincoln to drop back in the pocket and fire some trick shots to slack-jawed witnesses. Honest Abe is never one to lie, although we don't know if this video was doctored at all. The second song might be the most horrendous thing to ever be recorded, so muting the video after the last notes of Gary Glitter's Rock & Roll, Pt. II is strongly encouraged.

Friday, September 16

New Era Commercial- 912

Unless you've never visited this blog, surely you've stumbled across the amazing New Era John Krasinski and Alec Baldwin commercials.  I've never seen them on television, but you know what? That doesn't matter. They have never failed to cause laughter, and this one, the longest one yet, is no different. Krasinski's Red Sox are struggling the real world, but I still think he gets the win in this one, which, if you're keeping score at home, might be his first legitimate win.

In this episode, we see just how flammable Red Sox tickets are, and we learn a new phone number to call if we ever get rich. Seems like a win-win to me.

New Found Glory - Radiosurgery

Any fan of A Hot Cup knows New Found Glory is a bit of a guilty pleasure for his ears. While most adult males have outgrown the pop-punk quintet's simple chord progression and nasally vocals, that's not the case with yours truly. With a new album out October 4, it seems as good a time as any to release a music video for the lead single, "Radiosurgery." It's not a particularly great song or video, but hey, sometimes you'll get a mention on the blog just for being involved in nearly half my life.

Thursday, September 15

More Landry Fields

Remember how we decided Landry Fields, the New York Knickerbocker, was a funny man? Well, if you don't, here's some more comedy. The (at-the-time) rookie joins fellow (at-the-time) rookie Andy Rautins on a speed-dating challenge. It's part of the sort of regular Andy and Landry Show, and it provides some solid laughs. I especially like the woman that doubts Fields plays basketball. Check out parts one and two below.

Monday, September 12

Super Smash Bros. - The Board Game

YouTuber JGab312 wants a job with Nintendo or Hasbro. To prove it, he made an entire board game based off of the Super Smash Bros. franchise. Yes, the video is long, but you have to admire the time, determination, and overall panache it takes to make something this complex. Granted, I'm sure most people would rather just fire up an iteration of Smash on their N64, GameCube or Wii, but for the more casual fan,  this something great to eat up.

When You Combine Two Good Things, Sometimes You Get One Awesome Thing

This could win for longest title on the blog, but more importantly, it certainly wins for Most Awesome thing on the blog. In this case, some wise people at various places like Sky Zone have combined dodgeball and a trampoline to form a super sport called "Trampoline Dodgeball." The video below can explain anything better than I can, but it's recently been discovered that nearby A Hot Cup's hometown, in Niles, IL, there is a comparable place with trampoline sports (Sky High Sports). Barring some sort of force preventing the attendance of said comparable place during a visit home, we may have an in-depth, up close and personal look at just how awesome this may be. Until then, happy jumping.

Sunday, September 11

Ranking the Pokemon: #133- Oddish

You really only have to look at Oddish to understand why it's this low on the list. Even if it wasn't completely useless already, its appearance (a cross between a Smurf and a troll) simply doesn't get the job done. It does learn Flash and Cut, though, so as an HM slave it's passable, but it's also really annoying, as all Grass types are. I also always kind of hated this entire line of evolutions, possibly because I played Blue growing up and didn't have any opportunities to pick up Oddish, short of trading. Fortunately I traded a Rattata or something equally pathetic to get this oddball, and I can tell you it was not worth it.

Grade: D

Previously: #134- Grimer

Landry Fields is a Funny Man

New York Knickerbocker Landry Fields certainly had a successful rookie season. As a second round draft pick, he averaged just under 10 points and six boards a game, but lost in the shuffle was that he is a pretty hilarious guy. We'll have another post later this week with more shenanigans, but for now, watch as he follows in the footsteps of DeSean Jackson and Danny Woodhead, becoming an honorary Modell's employee trying to sell his own jersey.

Thursday, September 8

Star Fox TV

As Star Fox 64 3D hits the Nintendo 3DS tomorrow, it seems like as good a time as any to watch smosh's "Star Fox TV Show" video. It borrows heavily from Jersey Shore, but any fan of Fox and company will enjoy the hilarity. There's even a semi-surprise cameo, but all of the favorite quotes are here, from "Hey Einstein, I'm on your side" to "Do a barrel roll!" I personally also like the added touch of the "critical danger" noise when Slippy starts taking to the bottle. Well done all around, and a special shoutout to my buddy Brobasaur for bringing it to A Hot Cup's attention.

Friday, September 2

Happy Birthday Mama!

A Hot Cup would like to wish a wonderful and happy birthday to Mama Cup, who is currently having a wild weekend tearing up the Dakotas with Papa Cup. She's been an endless source of advice, entertainment, information, and most importantly, hugs. And for that I am extremely thankful. My call to action is for everyone to tell their mom they love them. Even if it's via text message. Do it. Right now. As Kanye West said, "It don't gotta me mother's day, or your birthday, for me to just call and say, 'Hey Mama.'" Granted, it is my mom's birthday, but I still call her even if it's not, so do the same! And have an excellent Labor Day weekend!

The Six Ways You See Your Dad

A couple of days ago, College Humor posted a video entitled "The Six Ways You See Your Dad." It is eerily accurate. While my dad never prevented me from going to Warped Tour because I didn't mow the lawn (the generally subpar bands were usually more of an obstacle than anything else), he's served as a number of these roles, and ironically enough, did and still does play guitar, echoing the fictional dad in this video. Regardless of how you feel about your papa, remember that he helped shape you into the person you are today, so make sure you thank him every once in awhile. And enjoy CH's take on fathers below.